Breaking the Silence — Why Men Hide Depression Differently

About 21 million American men and women have had at least one major depressive episode, but they show it — and hide it — differently. As a virtual psychiatric provider serving adults across Colorado, Ohio, Florida, and Massachusetts, Drew Pittman, PMHNP, sees how men often suffer silently. 

Societal expectations, biological differences, and internalized stigma can all affect how men deal with mental health issues. At Sound Psychiatry and Wellness, we believe that understanding how men hide depression differently is the first step toward helping them live more fully — without shame or fear.

Why men often show depression differently

Women are more likely than men to get depressed, but men tend to express it in less obvious ways. In men, you’re more likely to see some of the following:

• Uncharacteristic anger or irritability instead of sadness
• Increased risk-taking or impulsive behaviors
• Substance abuse or higher use of alcohol/narcotics to self-manage distress
• Physical complaints — such as headaches, fatigue, digestive issues — rather than emotional ones

A mix of biology, culture, and conditioning creates and shapes these differences. Testosterone, social pressure to “be strong,” and beliefs about what it means to be a man can all discourage sharing pain. Many men learn early to tough it out rather than reach out, which means depression can go unrecognized and untreated for longer.

How stigma and obstacles block seeking help

Why do men so often wait until things are really bad before asking for help? Some of the barriers include:

• Fear of being judged, seen as weak, or failing expectations
• Misconceptions that “talking” suggests that someone else caused your problems
• Lack of emotional vocabulary — not having words to describe what’s going on inside
• Feeling uncomfortable in traditional therapy settings
• Concerns about confidentiality

These obstacles often add up until depression takes a big toll on daily life, work, relationships, sleep, and overall well-being.

How we help men break through 

At Sound Psychiatry and Wellness, Drew Pittman aims to remove as many of those barriers as possible, using tools and approaches that align with real life, schedules, and comfort. Here are some ways we can help:

Virtual appointments allow you to meet from home or a private space, so there are fewer logistical and emotional barriers.

We prioritize direct communication and use clear language about what depression is, why it seems different in men, and what treatment really involves, so there’s no guesswork.

We offer flexibility in treatment style, often combining therapy, medication, and sometimes lifestyle adjustments tailored to your goals (work stability, family, energy, etc.).

Check-ins and measurable goals allow us to monitor your progress together, so you see what’s working and adjust if it’s not.

Why virtual care makes a difference for men

Working with you virtually reduces the obstacles many men face when seeking mental health care. Less travel time. Less worry about someone seeing you walk into a psychiatry office. More control over your environment when talking openly. When you feel safe and sure about your privacy, you’re more likely to open up and heal.

Signs it’s time to reach out

You might want to think about it if:

• You feel constantly irritable, angry, or frustrated more than you feel sad or down
• Life feels draining, energy is low, work or home don’t offer relief or joy
• You find yourself turning to alcohol, drugs, or risky behavior to numb things
• Sleep, appetite, or personal relationships start to suffer
• You catch yourself isolating or avoiding what you used to enjoy

If any of these feel familiar, it’s not too late to get help.

Depression doesn’t have to be a burden you carry alone, and you don’t have to wait for others to notice. We can help you find your voice, get tools that work, and work toward healing — no matter where you are.

Call us or request an appointment online today across Colorado, Ohio, Florida, or Massachusetts — virtual care is waiting, so you don’t have to wait anymore.